Today, prude has come close to converting someone for the better, and she will relate her tale to her readers and potentials.
This is the tale of prude and Burger Boy.
Burger Boy was sitting in a cafe today, munching away on burgers as young boys do. I has seen him careering about doing immoral things such as drinking and with young ladies. I used to call out to him useful things such as "That is immoral Burger Boy you shall bot be respected by me for that and that is important in life!"
However he called out to me in the past things not good to print here.
But today he is not being wild. He is munching on a burger. I say to myself, hmmm, what has brought about this change? Perhaps I has instilled himself a sense of good, and he is following my common sense. Even if burgers is not the most nutritional of foods in the universe some people need to take baby steps. So I approach him and he say to me, "Oh it is YOU, prude."
I feel I is making headway, at least he remembers me. That is a good sign.
"Yes it is me. Now let me ask you why you is not being your usual bad boy self. Was it because of something I said?"
"Yes it was you fool," he say. "I has been dropped by my fabulous girlfriend you know the one I mean the blonde one with the long black fingernails, she can't stand the way you scream and yell at me every time we pass the burger joint together. You have made her disappear! No more wild nights on the balcony for me. Thanks a lot!"
"You is very welcome," I say. "I perceive my mission is penetrating in ways I did not earlier imagine."
"I isn't even drinking because I want to stay sharp to plot my revenge," he complained.
"Yippee!" I say. "Although revenge of a young buxom-y lady is not so admirable abstinence from alcohol is. I commend you. Prude works in mysterious ways."
"I meant revenge on you, nutter," he growled. He look rather menacing.
Prude gets her cluey moments. She jumps up and says, "Burger Boy, enjoy your newly found moral enlightenment, I shall monitor it closely ... or perhaps from a distance ..."
While there is a lot still that need be done for Burger Boy, I think this may be some small steps for him, but some giant leap for prudekind.
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5 comments:
Oh look Prude he speaks just like you! You two should get together....
I think you're in, there. You just need to make sure you have his attention. What you need to do is accidentally spill some thick shake on him. For extra attention, spill it on his groin. To win his heart and mind, lick it up. Follow my advice Prude and you won't go wrong.
Another soul saved, huzzah!
Yes he speak like me, as I say, prude's good influence is penetrating in mysterious yet GOOD ways.
I is proud of myself.
Friendless, one may lap up attention and praise, but that does not mean I laps up milkshakes from naughty parts.
Even if they is good prudey vanilla milky shakes.
Hmmm.
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